3 Reasons Assassin’s Creed II Won’t Suck

1) CHARACTER: While Altair had his hood all up and shit, like he was some mystery ghetto killer, we never really got to know him. What was he like? Where is he from? What did it feel like to kill for the first time? How does he get those robes so white? I mean they don’t have Tide in the 12^th century. HOW, DAMMIT, HOW?

While Altair was basically a tall drink of shut-the-hell-up-and-die, Creed II’s Ezio is a different beast. A 14^th Century Italian nobleman, Ezio has the playfulness and vigor of the Renaissance in his blood and it’s only when he’s betrayed that he seeks to become an assassin. His background is much more thorough and you know him and play him before he dons the assassins hood for a kill. His past makes for a much more compelling character and let’s face it, who hasn’t wanted to secretly be an Italian nobleman? (Anyone? Anyone?)

2) LOCALE: Not that the Crusades made for boring cities or anything, but Jerusalem, Damascus, and the other fun one sucked. Horribly. While the buildings were architecturally accurate and that’s a huge plus to the developers, the three cities had no unique style, no unique landmarks with no noticeable difference between the three. I had to pause just to remember where the fuck Altair was. The cities were also full of these spaz homeless people who would hit you for no reason, so you’d kill them, then guards would chase you. Memo to Ubisoft: I’M 90% POSITIVE NOBODY CHASED ANYBODY WHEN A HOMELESS GUY DIED.

Needless to say, Assassin’s Creed II’s cities are far more interesting. Venice, Rome, Florence and the Tuscan countryside are at Ezio’s complete disposal… sigh. So lovely this time of year. The cities are much more architecturally interesting while maintaining the originals sense of truthfulness. The denizens of each city are also much more alive and less annoying for no reason. Also, you can also explore them at night, because in Creed I, Altair was a little bitch and never thought to kill people at night when there’s more to hide in than a haystack.

3) GAMEPLAY: Actually exists in this one. Assassin’s Creed had many serious gameplay problems, the biggest being repetition. If being an assassin in boring cities wasn’t enough, the way you gathered enough information to make your mark was even more boring. You listened to whiners talk, picked pockets for useless maps, and interrogated people who really didn’t know anything I couldn’t have guessed. What’s worse is that they made you do it over and over and over and over and over and over and over again until you stop playing just because you hate being an assassin and wish there was a mode where you could play as the crazy homeless guy who never knocks anyone over but assassins fleeing the law. Postscript: Altair controlled like an Olympian with OCD. Often jumping, falling, climbing, and running in seemingly random directions. Also, the battles sucked due to the same four kill strokes repeated over and over.

I can’t even guarantee that Assassin’s Creed II will fix all of the above issues but there are several new improvements that make me confident that it will. Over 15 mission types means there’s a greater variety of things for Ezio to do before he puts a knife in somebody’s neck. As well as not being afraid of the dark, Ezio can swim, fly and even boat around, opening up huge gameplay options for players sick of free running atop buildings. There’s also a greater plethora of weapons, with Ezio having access to halberds, axes, long pikes, swords, daggers and many more. Adding a currency system as well as a notoriety system makes Ezio (and the player) care about his relationship to the city’s people. And keep a close eye on them.

So there you have it. Three reasons that Assassin’s Creed II won’t suck. At least not as bad as Assassins Creed. Watch for a full review shortly and listen in for our roundtable on a future podcast.